Dude. Let me tell you how freaking nerve-wracking it is to talk about Jesus 2 episodes in a row. And like I’m not saying it’s HARD for me to talk about Jesus, not at all. But it IS vulnerable. To share a major part, the most important part, of MY life because of fear of how you’ll perceive. So I’ll start with this: Take what serves you, leave the rest. Let these stories, reflections, and affirmations work through you. Don’t let the ‘taboo-ness’ or woo-woo push you away.
This episode is going to transform you, if you let it, even if you forgo it being from the Bible. So, errgoes, today I want to talk to you about a study by Life Changes on Proverbs. Fun fact: I was thrifting awhile ago, as I often do, way too often maybe, and I ALWAYYYSSSS go to the book section. Do you know how many popular books on my TBR that I’ve found for 25 cents to 1 dollar….?! Gosh!!! So many. And so, this day, I stumbled upon some Bible studies by Life Change. Each study was a small book, roughly 150 pages, diving into a book of the bible. I can tell they were pretty old…but I grabbed a few to try out.
Now I’ll be the first to tell you – prior to this study, I don’t think I’ve ever finished a full bible study. Which is crazy and embarrassing to say, but mannnn when I went through this study on Proverbs, I don’t know how I’ve studied and finished all the books I have, without finishing a study like this. I still need to do a testimony episode..I feel it coming soon, but not quite yet. So without diving into too much of my background here, I want to give you some of my biggest, favorite, and transformative takeaways from this study on Proverbs.
I’ll link the book I’m going through in the shownotes, and I do highly, highly recommend it. It’s like…manageable and powerful, not overwhelming.
So, let’s go ahead and talk about it.
Proverbs is a book all about wisdom. And wisdom, as relative as it may be to us, is defined secularly as, “the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment; the quality of being wise.” Biblically, it’s actually pretty simple: Fear God. And I feel like this is, unironically, a terrifying reflection. Like if I have to fear God, how do I authentically submit to Him? How do I enthusiastically study His words? How do I put God first without gaslighting my own human life?
That’s where this study comes in. Proverbs brings so much hope and contentment.
One of my biggest lesson and struggle is with discipline. Ya know, I can blame it on my ADHD, and I talked in the last epsiode about how I watch my husband navigate his day-to-day and it just seems so…simple. But for me, discipline feels like being put in a box that was duct taped together and buried 3 feet under the ground. Far enough for it to take awhile to get out, but shallow enough I may make it.
But Proverbs reminds us that the more wisdom we have, the more disciplined we are. The more disciplined, the more blessed. And I can see how when I know more about things or topics or jobs or whatever, it’s easier to be disciplined. When I know the outcome, and I want the outcome, I find myself practicing discipline smoother. I submit to the routine without feeling like I’m boxed in. Not always, but I can see this pattern.
I’m going to read Proverbs 3:13-18 –
So, I ask you – where is your wisdom guiding you? Are you leaning into discipline? Or do you find yourself moreso going with the flow without grounding yourself into a healthy routine that allows you to grow?
There’s no right or wrong answer, by the way. To ANYTHING I say today. This episode can simply be for reflection.
So Proverbs also discusses what it’s like to be a fool, which if we know anything about fools, it’s this: no one wants to be the fool.
When I think of being a fool, the first thing that comes to mind is having a joke played on you. No matter how small, it SUCKKKKSSSS to be the only one left out of the joke. Especially if you don’t know it’s a joke. There’s nothing that can make you feel more foolish than everyone laughing at you, without you being in on the punchline.
Being a fool without wisdom is like walking around this world in a joke where everyone, except for you, knows the punchline.
Proverbs says the following about fools:
- Fools despise wisdom and instruction
- Fools follow worthless things without sense
- Fools are loud and reactive (ouch at me)
- Fools vent openly
- Fools aren’t able to learn
- Fools focus on treasures and riches
See, moral (which is somewhattttt relative) and wisdom living don’t move as quickly as fools wish. Fools are impatient. Fools look for the next shiny object instead of long-goal wins.
If you’re a business owner, and if you’re a freelancer listening, yes, you, too, are a business owner, I’d like to encourage you to replace ‘fools’ with undisciplined business owners.
Undisciplined business owners chase after riches, not internal growth. Undisciplined business owners are loud and reactive. Undisciplined business owners are impatient.
And if you aren’t a business owner, I’d encourage you to replace fools or undisciplined business owners with hopeless.
This may be heavy. Take a breath. I love you. Also, I had to go through this, and am going through this, so please do not feel alone.
Hopeless people aren’t able to learn. Hopeless people don’t keep their word. Hopeless people chase the next shiny object. Hopeless people quit their goals before they’ve had a real shot at reaching them.
Which are you? Are you wise? Are you chasing wisdom? Or are do you lack discipline? Are you acting hopeless? Are you leaning into being a fool?
Another specific thing that Proverbs says about discipline is that discipline equals love. Discipline with others, in relationships, looks like love. I need you to hear this:
Discipline with your family means loving them enough to encourage them to do better.
Discipline with your business means loving yourself and your community enough to show up every day.
Discipline with God means loving Him enough to prioritize time with Him.
I think this is so important because we often get caught up in “oh well discipline means pushing people away so I can do what I need to do. It means following my routine at all means necessary.”
No, discipline, healthy discipline, is simply love. It’s love for yourself, your community, your partner, your kids – enough love to call yourself and others to a higher standard, every day. How beautiful is that? This reframe for discipline, rather than it being a box I’m burying myself in, has been HUGE for me.
Proverbs also has a pretty hefty influence on friendships and the relationships you carry within your life.
Listen – even as an online business owner, it is NOT your job to be besties with everyone. But it IS entirely your responsibility to be an IN-FREAKING-FREDIBLE friend to your friends. (Now this doesn’t be an absolute shit person to everyone else, but I trust you feel my heart with this.)
See, wealth and abundance will bring SO MANY people to you. Fame and fortune brings people and brings people and brings people….but not everyone is supposed to be in your circle. Choose carefully.
Here are a few characteristics and qualities Proverbs calls us to look for in our friendships:
- Trustworthiness
- Love
- Wisdom
- Slow to anger
- Gracious speech
- Sweetness
It’s funny because I read these things and immediately am like mannnnn I have so much growing to do, like I’m not all that great of a companion when it comes down to it. I mean, I’m growing!!!! And I have most of these traits…but Iwouldn’t say I’m yetttt slowwww to anger. Not as fast as I once was…but not slow. And my speech, well sometimes my mouth moves fast than my brain pauses to thing, and I say some not-so-gracious things.
Whatever. I’m trying. Not perfect, but trying. And I read this list, not to shame myself for what I’m not, but to encourage my growth.
So here’s my commitment: I will not hold back on sharing good things, like this episode. I will abide in my trustworthiness and love. I will continue seeking wisdom. I will prioritize gracious speech and fast forgiveness.
Another part of Proverbs I find interesting for business owners especially, is the guidance on a good reputation.
Chapter 22 verse 1 says a good name is far better than great riches, silver, and gold.
Are you chasing riches or a good, honorable name?
I know I’ve gotten, and still probably do, get caught up in chasing riches: more money, more cool vacations, more books…
But what could my life and my business look like if I chases FAST after a good reputation?
The cool thing, too, is that you always have the power to change your story and start running after a good name. It doesn’t mean that EVERYONE will have this truth of you in their story – for instance, I know some people will look past the fact that I got kicked out of highschool my senior year or that I wrong an article outing myself as a retired sex worker.
I also know that there are people who currently know me and will meet me in the future that will have NO CLUE about these things until I tell them. It’s not to say you’re controlling your reputation, because to an extent, you’re not. But working hard to build a good name for yourself in the next year, 5 years, decade WILL do a lot more for you than dwelling on what your highschool or early adult reputation was…from people who don’t even know what their reputation is.
One of the best ways to do this? Humble yourself. Strip away the pride of who you think you have to be. Lean into exactly who you are: What is your name? What does it mean to you? What do you want it to mean? To stand for? How are you pushing closer or further away from the reputation you desire?
Truly lean into yourself and recognize the name you’re building. Recognize if you want it to change. Ask yourself how. And then take action.
Take action because you love yourself enough to be disciplined in creating a spectacular, honorable name for yourself. Work hard to get there because you aren’t lazy, you are determined.
Proverbs 21:25 says, “The craving of a sluggard will be the death of him, because his hands refuse to work.” Are you being lazy or are you pushing towards the life you desire? I like to paraphrase this verse saying, “You want what you’re unwilling to work for; you’ll never be fulfilled.”
You’ll always be able to find an excuse to NOT do something, but how many times are you intentionally searching for reasons TO DO something?
Do you search for reasons to finish client projects as much as you find reasons to procrastinate?
Do you search for ways to help people in your community as often as you find reasons to keep to yourself?
Do you search for opportunities to serve your audience as often as you decide you’re too tired, ‘not ready enough’, or simply unwilling to show up?
Oooof. This episode is as much for me as it is for you, trust me.
Because here’s the thing: When do don’t act due to laziness, you’re not cheating your business. Or the world. Or your community. Or God.
You’re literally just cheating yourself.
When you don’t take action, you cheat yourself. When you don’t practice healthy discipline, you’re cheating yourself.
When you don’t chase after a good reputation, you’re cheating yourself.
When you don’t love yourself and others, you’re only cheating yourself.
Paraphrased, Proverbs 18:9 says, “If you slack in your work, you may as well be the one destroying it.”
So the next time you want to blame something on a lack of engagement, or the algorithm, or how someone responded to you, or mercury being in the microwave…I urge you to ask yourself:
“In what ways am I slacking?” TAKE THEM OUT OF THE EQUATION!!!! “In what ways am I slacking and how is it destroying my work?”
OOOOOOFFFF. THAT PART! THIS EPISODE!!! OH IT’S SO GOOD!!!!
Okay, as we begin to kindaaa sorta wrap up this episode, we’re going to talk on helpful speech – and how this applies to your business.
Proverbs 16:24 says, “Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.”
Sweet to the soul and health to the bones.
The words you speak can literally bring healing. The reason I think this is SO IMPORTANT as a business owner, expecially in the online space and ESPECIALLY for any copywriter:
The words you speak are either healing or harming. There’s no mediocre in-between. Are you healing your community, your clients, your audience, or are you harming them?
And like I don’t want you to feel like you now have to walk on eggshells or anything. Rachel Turner, a trauma-informed business coach who I love learning from, says, “You can say macaroni and offend someone.”
But are you intentioanlly using words that build up or tear down? Intent is what matters here, because you will hurt people, I hate to be the bearer of bad news. But there are levels to it, and when your intent is to build up, I personally believe it’s a heck of a lot better than either
- Intentionally tearing someone down or
- Unintentionally sharing words just to share words, regardless of the consequences
Paraphrased by me, Proverbs 25:11 reminds us that putting thought and eloquence into what you say is a treasure! A kind tongue is rare and desired.
Put thought into the words you’re spreading – your emails, sales pages, product descriptions, and social media posts. Intentionally build people up. (If you want another episode to check out in relation to this, listen to episode X. Heroes’ Journey vs the Human Story, where we discuss talking to people like their humanssss throughout our marketing, not tearing them down through pain points solely in the name of selling.)
OKAY I LOVE YA. This is all I have for you today. I hope you enjoyed this episode, and if you have questions, send them over! I’d love to talk with you more about this. And if there’s someone you think could benefit from this episode, send it over to them. You never know how it can impact their life and business.
If you aren’t sure who to send it too, post it on your Instagram stories and tag me so I can shower you in love!
Thank you for your continues support. Check the shownotes for more info. Thanks for hanging. Peace out girl scout.
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